When your child is given a diagnosis, it’s natural to want a crystal ball to see the future.
Sawyer was diagnosed with cerebral palsy as an infant after his brain injury. I asked so many questions of the doctors and they answered the best they could. What will this be like? Will he walk? How will this affect our lives? What does this mean for his future?
The truth is, no doctor has a crystal ball. They aren’t able to look into the future.
They can only make guesses on what they have seen in the past. They don’t know each child or how their brain will work. They don’t know the personalities of each child or their level of perseverance. One surgeon said he sees kids with Sawyer’s injuries in clinic walking and seemingly normal and other times he sees kids with less severe injuries that are in wheelchairs. He said his brain is complicated and he does not know how or why it works out that way since the brain is so complex.
I may have told you this before but when we told our nurse friend about his brain injury she simply said “It’s not a terminal diagnosis. A friend of mine has a child with Down’s Syndrome. He is a wonderful kid and he’s learning just like every other kid, but he is on his own timeline. You will get to see Sawyer accomplish things and be even more excited than you would a typical child.” This was so comforting to hear and rings true today.
Yesterday, Sawyer learned how to ride his trike on the same day his sister learned how to ride her bike.
I would have NEVER guessed a year ago that he would be pushing himself and pedaling down the driveway next to his sister. He does have to work much harder at this than his sister, but he does it with a smile. The twins were riding bikes together. Even now, I am brought to tears.
It’s HARD having a child that isn’t typical.
It’s hard not to think “What if?”. I sometimes see boys his age running around, and I often wonder what he would be like. Would he be running and doing boy things, or would he be the exact same personality he is just mobile? It’s hard to picture Sawyer any other way than he is. He is hard working, smart, funny and so chill.
Even though Sawyer isn’t what we pictured when we were told we were pregnant with boy/girl twins he is exactly how he should be. He is our miracle and we have a unique opportunity to watch tiny miracles each day. I am thankful I can’t see the future; each accomplishment is a celebration.