It’s almost time for the children to go back to school. I’m always excited when its time for them to go back until the day comes for them to finally go back.
Especially for our oldest son Jaylen who has special needs and is nonverbal.
If there is any change in his school, teachers or teacher aides its instant anxiety for me.
I absolutely hate change when it involves him. And for the past couple of years this has always happen.
So, every year on his first day of school I cry.
My husband must make me leave the classroom.
I remember about two years ago after being at the same school with the same teacher for four years they moved him.
On his first day of school I was nervous, and my anxiety was through the roof.
When we got to the school, we wheeled him in and met his new teacher as well as the aides.
All I thought about the entire time is taking my baby back home. I asked a million questions and they answered them.
They were very sweet but still I did not want to leave my baby with them.
After my husband saw that I was procrastinating he said let’s go.
I kissed my baby and we began walking to the door.
As I walked towards the door tears began to fall. My breath was short, and I just wanted to go back in that classroom to get my baby.
All while my husband is consoling me and reassuring me that Jaylen would be alright.
While walking down another parent notice I was crying and asked my husband was I alright.
She than asked, is this your baby first day of kindergarten too? My husband said no, our son is in the sixth grade.
The look on that lady face was priceless but if you aren’t a parent of a child with special needs you probably wouldn’t understand either.
We know our children need to go to school because they need to learn as well as socialize with their peers.
Its just something about putting them in the care of others that seems so hard to do.