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“He ain’t heavy, he’s my brother”

“He ain’t heavy, he’s my brother”

Two boys. Two different personalities. Two different sets of needs. Two different ways of thinking.

They face very different challenges. But they are brothers and for the most part they are best buddies. My boys have spent so much time together over the last while as we’ve been shielding and our country has been in a state of lockdown.

I was apprehensive about this at the beginning; it can be a difficult balancing act to juggle both their needs. However, I was determined to make the most of our time at home and to make precious memories for them. I have to say I have loved seeing their relationship grow during this time.

Together they have built story dens, had discos in the living room, watched movies, played on the PlayStation. They have baked, raced on their wheels, chilled in the garden. They have made up games, helped each other with schoolwork, had fancy dress days. They have laughed a lot and had lots of silly nonsense. They have accepted each others needs and embraced each other’s quirks.

They seem to have gained more understanding of each other and have enjoyed this time together.

Of course, like all brothers, they’ve had their moments. They’ve argued over who gets to choose the game or who said the answer first. They’ve fought over what movie to watch and they’ve screamed at each other to be quiet! They certainly know how to push each other’s buttons and they’ve definitely, at times, needed time out from each other to just chill on their own.

But when one is sick, the other is worried. When one has been sad, the other tries to cheer them up. When one is having a melt down, the other tries to calm them down. When one is upset about something, the other tries to get them smiling again. When one needs their daily physio, the other wants to help. When one is having a hard time understanding change of routine, the other tries to reassure.

By bedtime each night they are always best buddies again and they say prayers for each other before going to sleep. My hope is that this time spent together has bonded them and whatever life throws at them they have this special relationship because “he ain’t heavy, he’s my brother”.

Firefly Blog

Real life stories, issues and experiences of day to day life by special needs parents and
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Amy Cameron

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I’m mummy to 2 boys with very different needs - follow us to see how we live a different kind of normal.

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