Language
  • English
  • French
  • German
  • Italian
  • Portuguese
  • Spanish
  • Swedish

Insurance Funding Request

Did you know Firefly products may be funded by your insurance?

Learn More
Back to Firefly Blog

Advocate like a Mother

Advocate like a Mother

This is a phrase I see so often, and one that resonates with me strongly. In my line of work (legal) advocacy is a pinnacle part of day to day life. The legal arguments are key, but what is often more important is the way in which you advocate.

Can you convince others, through spoken or written language, to side with you, to see your way of thinking and to agree? It sounds straight forward, but there are multiple sides to each story (often more than two) and it is not always the case that one way is right. There is not always an answer or solution.

Since becoming a mother, I have learnt to advocate far more than I ever did at law school and in some very strange circumstances. As a mother, you are often seen to be irrational or overreacting. It is as though others think that you lose all ability to think clearly and to process information once you become a mother.

Only this week, I have been told “you want solutions straight away and don’t stop to think about the wider implications”.

This follows Alfie being admitted to hospital again, seriously unwell and me voicing my opinion about what I think is the cause, and the possible solutions I would like to be considered. Me, as his mother, the person who is with him each and every day, the person who knows what her child is feeling though he is unable to verbalise it, the person who meets his needs each and every day.

And yet I was swiftly dismissed with strong implications that the doctor felt I was exaggerating Alfie’s condition, and that there was no way Alfie could be vomiting 40 times a day. Yet Alfie has lost a kilogram in under 3 weeks, and so though the doctor placed seeds of self-doubt in my head, I did not let it go. I pushed for him to have bloods done, and for a second opinion which ultimately confirmed I was right. I made sure my voice was heard and that my child got the care he needs.

I have no medical training, yet due to being a parent of a child with additional needs, I know far more than medical professionals expect. I do my research and do not let them bully me. They may not like it when I disagree, but I will not stop if I think they are wrong.

They have had the medical training, but it is me that cares for my child each day. I am the one who is expected to act as his carer despite having only been shown how to do something for half an hour (if that), so I’ll be damned if they think they can dismiss my opinions without a second thought.

Firefly Blog

Real life stories, issues and experiences of day to day life by special needs parents and
healthcare professionals.

Rebecca Highton

Meet Our Blogger

I am a mum of twins, one has special needs. I enjoy blogging about life and the reality of parenting.

View Rebecca’s Profile

Become a Firefly Blogger

Would you like to write for Firefly? Join our blogger network of parents, therapists and professionals.

Get In Touch

Become a subscriber today

Join over 40,000 subscribers to our weekly newsletter with insightful articles just when you need them.

Join Mailing List

By using our site you agree to our use of cookies. Click here for more info.

Accept & Close

No Interest if paid in full in 6 months on

Purchases on $99+

US Customers only. Subject to credit approval. See terms below

Paypal Credit

Pay now or pay over time with PayPal Credit. Just use PayPal Credit in PayPal checkout.

Subject to credit approval.

Purchases of $99+:

No Interest if paid in full in 6 months on purchases of $99 or more.

  • A minimum monthly payment is required and may or may not pay off the promotional purchase by the end of the 6 month period.
  • No interest will be charged on the purchase if you pay it off in full within 6 months. If you do not, interest will be charged on the purchase from the purchase date at the Purchase APR applicable to your account.
  • For New Accounts: Variable Purchase APR is 25.49%. The APR is accurate as of 6/1/2018 and will vary with the market based on the Prime Rate (as defined in your credit card agreement). Minimum interest charge is $2.00.
  • Individual items that are less than $99 qualify for special financing when combined for a total of $99 or more in a single transaction.
  • Multiple separate transactions of less than $99 per transaction cannot be combined to meet the minimum purchase amount.

Purchases of $98.99 or less:

Buy now and pay over time with PayPal Credit when you spend $98.99 or less.

  • If you pay your balance in full each month by the payment due date that is on your statement, you can avoid paying interest.
  • Or, make minimum monthly payments, or any additional amount of your choosing, until you've paid off your balance according to your standard account terms. Please note, interest charges may apply.
  • We'll send you email reminders when your payments are due. You can also keep track of your account and view your statements online at any time.

About PayPal Credit

  • PayPal Credit is a reusable credit line available on purchases at thousands of stores that accept PayPal. It's also available for purchases on eBay and exclusively at thousands of other online stores. Plus, it comes with the same security and flexibility you trust from PayPal.
  • If approved, we start you off with a minimum credit line of at least $250. See FAQs for more info.
  • For New Accounts: Variable Purchase APR is 25.49%. The APR is accurate as of 6/1/2018 and will vary with the market based on the Prime Rate (as defined in your credit card agreement). Minimum interest charge is $2.00. See Terms and Conditions tab for more info.
  • If you miss a payment your late fee could be up to $38, even less if it's your first time. See FAQs for more info.

Please wait...