More so, God has blessed me with an incredible husband and an amazing little boy who has brought utter joy to my life.
I have so many things to be thankful for, sometimes they are difficult to see through the tears and frustration, but every one of us has something to smile about.
Don’t get me wrong I have hard days, but that's okay!
Not everything is simple and not everything plans out the way we imagined.
How can something you cannot see be your comfort?
Well, let me just pitch this idea to you, Zachariah cannot see very well, however he finds happiness in the TV, where some children would find entertainment in watching it, Zachariah enjoys listening to it.
I may not be able to see God as such but I can hear him giving me guidance and reassurance every day.
How can something you cannot see give you positivity?
God gives me hope. When Doctors told my husband and I that Zachariah may not survive, God gave me hope that I would meet my son.
When Doctors told me they did not know what quality of life Zachariah would have, God gave me hope that he would live an abundant life full of love.
When Doctors told me my son was severely visually impaired and they were not sure what he could see, God gave me hope that Zachariah would see beauty.
Zachariah sees beauty through lights and bold objects, he sees beauty by being surrounded by people who love and care for him.
God is love!
Some days I can feel very useless when it comes to caring for Zachariah and giving him what he needs.
He can become very restless and it can be very distressing and heart breaking trying to settle him.
I have sometimes wondered what it would be like for Zachariah to say “I love you mummy", as I have doubted that he has the ability to love me.
When I hit this dark place God assures me of his love and there’s no greater love than that!
God loves my son, my husband and me. God connects us and brings us all together.
So I can sit here and ponder if Zachariah will ever know what love is and how to love, or I can fill our home with the love I’ve learnt from God and just enjoy each day I’m blessed to have with my boy.
It is here I find peace, and try to live each day through a positive lens and count my blessings.