• English
  • French
  • German
  • Italian
  • Portuguese
  • Spanish
  • Swedish
Back to Firefly Blog

The family we choose ourselves

The family we choose ourselves

I have a big biological family; I am the eldest of five and with us all having partners and children of our own you can imagine those multiplying figures. 

In a lot of my SEN blogs since the start I’ve spoke about their support over the years, how were a multiplex family and how we share our journeys to some extent. 

Without them we would not have been able to carry on being a full-time working parents; they supported, adapted and helped us thrive.

They mean the world to me.

This blog is dedicated to the family that I chose for myself.  My FR-AMILY.

We all know that family isn’t always blood relatives, it’s the people we choose to have in our lives who also want us in theirs. 

They are the ones that accept us for who we are, warts and all. 

The ones that would do anything to see us smile.

My what’s-app is an awash of different group chats.  I had to turn the vibration off for the constant bzzzzz, bzzzzzzzzz of an evening, whilst I chuckle away at the latest GIF or try to offer my pennies worth in a debate. 

I have the besties groups, the kebab girl’s area and prosecco queens to name a few. 

There are friends within these groups that I can see up to once a month or as little as a once a year, but the love remains strong and we can just pick up where we last left off.

It is within these safe spaces that we can share our happiest and or our deepest darkest moments with these people. 

Share burdens that you would not necessarily want to worry your parents/siblings with, or a risqué joke that would makes your mothers toes curl.

I’ve told my son as he entered high school this last year that it’s not about having a 100 people who you know’ but selecting the right handful that you can take forward for the rest of your life. 

Its these people for me; mainly from my childhood and high school years that are here by my side today – oh but not forgetting those kebab girls I picked up in work a few years ago, they are alright and worth keeping around.

The encouragement and love we receive from the people we choose to have around and to share our life journey with is the perfect life tonic. 

I love my fr-amily – thank you all.

Firefly Blog

Real life stories, issues and experiences of day to day life by special needs parents and
healthcare professionals.

Zowie Kaye

Meet Our Blogger

My Big Fat Greek Family – we love our food and love each other even more. We're a like liquorice allsorts, all a bit different. I’m a full time working mum and married my best friend Jay. I thought my life was great until I became a mum and then realised it was complete. A few of our family allsorts may seem broken – they are not, they are just a bit different!

View Zowie’s Profile

Become a Firefly Blogger

Would you like to write for Firefly? Join our blogger network of parents, therapists and professionals.

Get In Touch

Become a subscriber today

Join over 40,000 subscribers to our weekly newsletter with insightful articles just when you need them.

Join Mailing List

By using our site you agree to our use of cookies. Click here for more info.

Accept & Close

No Interest if paid in full in 4 months on

Purchases on £99+

UK Customers only. Subject to credit approval. See terms below

Paypal Credit

Pay now or pay over time with PayPal Credit. Just use PayPal Credit in PayPal checkout.

Subject to credit approval.

Purchases of £99+:

No Interest if paid in full in 4 months on purchases of £99 or more.

  • A minimum monthly payment is required and may or may not pay off the promotional purchase by the end of the 4-month period.
  • No interest will be charged on the purchase if you pay it off in full within 4 months. If you do not, interest will be charged on the purchase from the purchase date at the Purchase APR applicable to your account.
  • Any remaining balance due after the 4-month promotional period or any transactions under £99 will be charged interest at 19.9% p.a. (variable).

Purchases of £98.99 or less:

Buy now and pay over time with PayPal Credit when you spend £98.99 or less.

  • If you pay your balance in full each month by the payment due date that is on your statement, you can avoid paying interest.
  • Or, make minimum monthly payments, or any additional amount of your choosing, until you've paid off your balance according to your standard account terms. Please note, interest charges may apply.
  • We'll send you email reminders when your payments are due. You can also keep track of your account and view your statements online at any time.

About PayPal Credit

  • PayPal Credit is a reusable credit line available on purchases at thousands of stores that accept PayPal. It's also available for purchases on eBay and exclusively at thousands of other online stores. Plus, it comes with the same security and flexibility you trust from PayPal.
  • In order to maintain the 0% offer, you need to keep up monthly repayments and stay within your credit limit. Credit subject to status. Terms and conditions apply. UK residents only.

Please wait...