• English
  • French
  • German
  • Italian
  • Portuguese
  • Spanish
  • Swedish
Back to Firefly Blog

Bittersweet Birthdays of a Kid with Special Needs

Bittersweet Birthdays of a Kid with Special Needs

Birthdays are an exciting time filled with colorful balloons, character cakes, and gifts ties up with ribbon.

Birthdays mean next-size-up in clothing or even going from a crib to a toddler bed.

It’s a house filled with family and friends and, if you’re in our family, cocktails too.

Birthdays are not just another day and another year older.

Birthdays mean celebration, reflection, and even small pains in my heart.

There is so much to be celebrated for a child’s birthday, but I have learned that birthday celebrations for a special needs child are so much more.

Our youngest son is medically fragile so as he turns another year older I wipe the sweat off my brow and am thankful we made it another year.

I reminisce about all of the children lost to his disorder and thank God he’s here.

I think about the 365 nights of interrupted sleep and high five my husband because we’re still standing.

I add up the 260 therapy appointments and take note of all of the progress over the last year.

I reflect on the sleepless nights in the hospital filled with worry and am so thankful we’re not there.

I smile thinking about the many people we have met just because our son is who he is.

I think about the friendships I’ve forged with other special needs parents and feel more than lucky.

Another year, another win.

When birthdays come around I am so thankful our son is on this earth, but the celebration isn’t without sorrow.

As he gets older the developmental gap between him and his peers gets greater and greater.

The gap that was a sliver has slowly started widening over time.

The older he gets the more his developmental delay stares me straight in my face.

He’s still trying to reach milestones that 6 month olds have mastered.

Birthdays remind me of what he could be doing.

I can picture in my mind the cake smash that could have happened.

I envision the ripping open of packages only to move on from one to the next.

I can imagine him singing Happy Birthday to himself days before and after his party.

But that’s not how it goes and I don’t know when it will.

Birthdays are bittersweet.

Our son is still very young and I can only imagine what his next birthday will bring.

We’ll be celebrating another year of accomplishment parenting a child who has extraordinary needs, but I know that there too will be hints of sadness.

The hints of sadness may be a reminder of what he could be doing but they will also remind me of what we have yet to achieve.

They’ll keep us moving forward and forging on.

Birthdays have become so much more than cake.

They’re a goal and a victory.

Firefly Blog

Real life stories, issues and experiences of day to day life by special needs parents and
healthcare professionals.

Melissa Schlemmer

Meet Our Blogger

Currently I am trying to juggle life with an infant, 7 year old, and a nearly 5 year old with special needs. Life is all kinds of crazy, but we are loving it all. I’m passionate about advocating for our son and sharing our story so other parents realize they aren’t alone in this.

View Melissa’s Profile

Become a Firefly Blogger

Would you like to write for Firefly? Join our blogger network of parents, therapists and professionals.

Get In Touch

Become a subscriber today

Join over 40,000 subscribers to our weekly newsletter with insightful articles just when you need them.

Join Mailing List

By using our site you agree to our use of cookies. Click here for more info.

Accept & Close

No Interest if paid in full in 4 months on

Purchases on £99+

UK Customers only. Subject to credit approval. See terms below

Paypal Credit

Pay now or pay over time with PayPal Credit. Just use PayPal Credit in PayPal checkout.

Subject to credit approval.

Purchases of £99+:

No Interest if paid in full in 4 months on purchases of £99 or more.

  • A minimum monthly payment is required and may or may not pay off the promotional purchase by the end of the 4-month period.
  • No interest will be charged on the purchase if you pay it off in full within 4 months. If you do not, interest will be charged on the purchase from the purchase date at the Purchase APR applicable to your account.
  • Any remaining balance due after the 4-month promotional period or any transactions under £99 will be charged interest at 19.9% p.a. (variable).

Purchases of £98.99 or less:

Buy now and pay over time with PayPal Credit when you spend £98.99 or less.

  • If you pay your balance in full each month by the payment due date that is on your statement, you can avoid paying interest.
  • Or, make minimum monthly payments, or any additional amount of your choosing, until you've paid off your balance according to your standard account terms. Please note, interest charges may apply.
  • We'll send you email reminders when your payments are due. You can also keep track of your account and view your statements online at any time.

About PayPal Credit

  • PayPal Credit is a reusable credit line available on purchases at thousands of stores that accept PayPal. It's also available for purchases on eBay and exclusively at thousands of other online stores. Plus, it comes with the same security and flexibility you trust from PayPal.
  • In order to maintain the 0% offer, you need to keep up monthly repayments and stay within your credit limit. Credit subject to status. Terms and conditions apply. UK residents only.

Please wait...