Additional Needs
Why we need the Special Olympics
by Jodi Shenal
on 3rd May, 2024
World Friendship Day 2018
- Tiana: “Cameron, you are my best friend.”
- Cameron: “Thanks – you are not mine.”
- Me: “She is your best friend out of school though, isn’t she Cameron? And Isla is your best friend in school?”
- Cameron: “Oh, well, yes that is actually correct!”
I was told in the early days after Cameron’s diagnosis that he would struggle with friendships; they he may be socially awkward but that as he was bright, most certainly had the ability to learn friendships.
I have always encouraged his friendships and made the time to have play dates.
He does prefer one on one gatherings so that he can focus and give his all to that person and that he doesn’t have to share his friend’s attention or affection.
He is a good loyal friend already at 10 years old, he just struggles sometimes with knowing the right things to say like above. He is very literal and has no filter.
He loves Tiana but as they are not in the same school and only see each other during holidays.
He just automatically thinks of his school friend who he spends every school day with.
Once I pointed out that you can have more than one best friend and that you just need to be careful about the replies you say to people as not to hurt their feelings – he was alarmed, he didn’t want Tiana to think that she wasn’t his best friend as she is.
I am fortunate to have some of THE best friends; true friends that will always make time for me, true listeners who support but most crucially – are brutally honest.
True friends who don't have motives and are not opportunistic.
It is these friendships that shaped me the person that I am today and who have shown me the importance of these relationships in our lives.
I want this for my child – I have always said, as long as you have a few best friends all is ok with the world, you do not need the approval or acceptance of loads of different people.
Cameron’s friendship with Tiana did have a helping hand to blossom and stems from my own friendship with her mother and likewise mine and her mothers are best friends.
But now that they are older and actually enjoy each other’s company by their own choice and shared interests, I believe that the friendship would not work if they didn’t both appreciate or want it.
Cameron will be going into high school next year and I am worried sick.
His statement granted me the ability to be able to select a high school that I think best suits his strengths; will give him the best start in his future but this also means it is not a catchment school, and there will be no one there from primary school that he knows.
This is an exceptionally difficult position that I obviously want the best for my son to help him grow but the thought of him starting from scratch with friendships is unnerving.
One step at a time though, he is growing into a considerate and comical young man.
He will talk to anyone in a new social situation and will always put himself forward to engage.
For the time being, I will carry on supporting him with the friends that he loves and lean on my best friends in turn for their support, love and advice.
Thank you; Michelle, Holly, Vicky, Paul, Jenny, Leanne, Jay
