Additional Needs

My Dear Oliver

Posted by Brittney Baumgartner on 5th September 2018 Additional Needs, Advice & Support, Disabilities

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I write this letter to you, with hopes that these words will someday lift you up.

I hope to look back and find hope in my own words, even when I feel down and defeated.

You are now a whopping four years old, and curious as ever.

You are always asking your daddy and me 100 questions.

Your inquisitive mind is always running 100 miles a minute.

And you know what?

I absolutely love it.

I love when you try to teach your younger brother, Theodore, right from wrong.

I love when you tattle on your older brother, Aaden.

But lately, you have started asking questions on why you can't walk like your brothers and friends.

You have asked, “If I eat ALL my food, will I walk like Theodore?”

You have even shared your fears about starting Pre-K and not being able to play like the other kids do.

My sweet baby boy, if I could only steals these thoughts and questions from you.

I knew these questions would come one day.

I knew you would one day notice that not every child like you has a wheelchair.

I even knew that you would notice how much harder it is for you to try walking, compared to your younger brother.

What I did not know, was how to answer these questions and inquiries.

There was never a playbook for mommy to turn to when I was stuck.

Do I be completely honest with you?

Or do I bend the truth a little, because I want you to still be hopeful and have faith?

To this day, I still don't have all the right answers.

I don't think I ever will.

But I take it step by step.

Day by day. Question by...question.

I tell you that even tho you may not walk like the other kids and your brothers, none of them have a cool, super fast wheelchair like you!

I tell you that God made you a little different and because of your scar on your back from Spina Bifida, you have to work just a little bit harder to stand tall or walk.

I instill hope that your friends and brothers will all see the good in you, and won't leave you behind.

And even though somedays I feel like I am doing it all wrong, you give me little hints that maybe I am doing it right.

Like when I walked in on you explaining to a young child that your wheelchair was to help you so you wouldn't scrape your knees all up on the floor.

So I encourage you to keep pushing, keep asking, keep educating.

We are in this together and we will both learn so many new things along the way!